Life without Music

For the first time in years, I am entering the holiday season without any music. After the first weeks of the semester, I realized that my coursework workload and the time and energy required for teaching would leave zero time for singing in my choir, which is a deep loss for me, especially since my a cappella group has disbanded. My voice feels rusty, dusty and untuned from neglect. My spirit feels much the same. I never realized how much music was such a huge, constant part of my life until now, and the holiday songs are ringing through my head. But it's not just the music that I miss. I miss laughing with my friends while rehearsing around a round table before we repeat a song we are returning or relearning. I miss the anticipation of bringing joy to people while caroling at a hospital or performing in a church. I miss standing in careful silence among a row of singers at attention, waiting for the smallest cue, waiting for our voices, meshing in harmony or blending as one, to soar.